Ubuheta

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This has undoubtedly been the most challenging blog I've written. Not because I lacked confidence, but because I wasn’t sure I could truly do it justice. Knowing how much my sister—and each of my siblings—values their privacy, I was especially surprised by her generosity in answering my questions. I now invite you to read this blog dedicated to Abiwacu's second-born.

Abiwacu

This project, which I will call "Abiwacu," has been on my mind for a few years now. For a long time, I’ve joked with my siblings about writing a blog post for each of them. Honestly, it could even turn into a book—there’s so much to share.

For those who don’t know, I have one brother and four sisters, and each of them has a story of their own. There's a soldier, an engineer, a surgeon, a scientist/artist, and a diplomat at heart. And then there’s me.

Beyond their careers, each of them has a unique personality. Growing up in such a large family, with uncles and cousins constantly coming and going, has shaped who I am—especially my ability to adapt.

As the youngest, I’ve often kept a more low-key presence, quietly observing and learning. This project is my way of reclaiming my voice, making myself heard, and sharing the stories that are closest to my heart. Let’s continue this journey of discovery with the second in the family.

A role model

A few years ago, someone asked me who my role models in life were. Not to make anyone jealous, but I remember mentioning my sister. At the time, I had just started university and it was largely because of her that I chose my major.

Did I have the same skills as she did? Certainly not. But a few years earlier, I had the chance to visit her at her workplace, and I remember how fulfilled she seemed as she spoke about the projects she was working on.

It’s a pleasure to see that, after all these years, she remains passionate about her work and grateful for her career. Here’s an excerpt from our interview:

Could you tell us about yourself?

I am an engineer. My work is focused on creating sustainable systems to improve water access and reduce disaster risks. Outside of work, I’m a wife and proud mother of three—two boys and a girl—who bring joy to my life. My faith in God guides me, and I value both family and the positive impact I can make personally and professionally.

What was it like growing up with a brother and four sisters?

It was a mix of chaos, laughter, and unforgettable moments. With so many unique personalities, there was never a dull moment. We supported each other, celebrated successes, and faced challenges together.

My brother taught me strength and protection, while my sisters nurtured my caring side, patience, and the importance of teamwork. In many Burundian and African households, mothers can be particularly strict with their first daughter, so I found myself balancing my growth while guiding and protecting my sisters. It was both a privilege and a challenge to lead by example, meeting expectations while staying grounded.

How did you decide what to study?

When I graduated high school, I was one of those people unsure of what to study (haha). I was passionate about chemistry, and pharmacy seemed like a natural fit, but by the time I made up my mind, it was too late to apply for it.

My parents, especially my mother, and cousins, guided me toward civil and environmental engineering. Their support played a key role in my decision.

In the second semester of my first year, I had to choose between civil engineering and water and environmental engineering. Inspired by my father, who worked on hydraulic and water supply projects, I chose water engineering.

Later, a professor in atmospheric science encouraged me to pursue a master's degree in hydrometeorology.

Looking back, I’m convinced that God used these people to guide me into this field and shape my path.

(Dad majored in chemistry at university, and he definitely passed on his love for it to most of his children. But I won’t say who didn’t inherit it (haha!). Editor's note)

What has your experience in engineering been like as a woman?

It has been a unique experience, full of challenges and rewarding moments. During my undergrad, I was one of only two women in a class of over 60 men. The gender imbalance brought its difficulties, especially with stereotypes, but it also taught me resilience and pushed me to excel.

For example, when I performed well on an assignment or exam, some classmates joked it was just because I was a girl. I remember one technical drawing assignment where I earned an A+. Some thought it was due to my gender, but it was really my attention to detail—something many women excel at.

On the flip side, being one of the few women sometimes had its perks. In crowded classrooms, classmates would offer me their seat, which made things easier.

These experiences sparked my curiosity and led me to pursue a master’s at a women’s university, where I met incredible, inspiring women. The environment was transformative—it made me stronger, more confident, and showed me the power of female solidarity in male-dominated fields.

What is your most memorable day?

The day I gave birth for the first time. It was a moment that completely changed my life, filled with emotions—joy, gratitude, and awe. Becoming a parent for the first time is an experience I will cherish forever.

(This little prince is one of the nephews for whom I wrote this short poem at his birth. A big shout-out to all the uncles and aunts who have seen their siblings' babies (our babies) born, and who find themselves touching the screen, smiling, and dreaming of holding this blood of their blood. Editor's note)

What was your least memorable day?

The day I learned that my child was on the autism spectrum. It was the first time I had heard of autism, and since I knew almost nothing about it, my initial reaction was fear and guilt—I wondered if I had done something wrong. I felt overwhelmed and uncertain about the future, not knowing how to support them. At that moment, I struggled to see neurodivergence in a positive light.

But over time, I learned to understand and accept. Today, I thank God for entrusting me with the responsibility of raising such a special child. It has taught me patience, resilience, and unconditional love in ways I never could have imagined.

What is the quality you admire most in your spouse?

His generous heart and unwavering support for others. If he can do something to help, he gives everything to make others happy. No matter what challenges I face—whether in my career, motherhood, or personal growth—he is always by my side, encouraging me to persevere. He believes in me even when I doubt myself, and this kind of reassurance is priceless. He also has a unique way of making me laugh, even in the most stressful moments, and I am deeply grateful for that.

(I can vouch for that—I had the privilege of living with them for a while, and his sense of humor, along with the way he expresses love while roasting the rest of us, was invaluable. Thank you for loving on her, Gangsta! Editor's note)

What have you learned since becoming a mom?

Motherhood has been one of the most transformative experiences of my life. I have learned that every child is unique, and there is no one-size-fits-all approach to raising a child. More importantly, it has taught me to be selfless—to put my children's needs before my own, out of love. However, I have also learned that taking care of myself is just as essential, as it allows me to be the best mom I can be.

What are your values?

Loyalty, excellence, and peace.

1. Just like my brother, loyalty is important to me because I believe in staying true to the people I hold dear and being a reliable person in all circumstances.

2. Excellence drives me to give my best in everything I do, always being intentional and committed to my growth.

3. I deeply value peace—I strive to create a peaceful environment around me, because I believe true happiness lies in harmony, both within and with others.

   
   

(She is one of the most peaceful souls I know, while also being incredibly determined in her actions and interactions with others. Editor's note)

Do you believe in God? Why?

Yes, I firmly believe in God. My faith has been shaped both by my personal experiences and the upbringing I received from my family. I grew up learning the importance of faith, but it was life’s experiences that truly solidified my belief.

One moment that particularly strengthened my faith was my studies in environmental forecasting and weather predictions. I had discussions with a meteorology classmate, and we often reflected on the fact that no human-created model could predict the atmosphere or weather with absolute accuracy. The limits of human knowledge made me realize that there is a higher power governing creation—something beyond our understanding.

Motherhood also deepened my faith, starting with pregnancy. The way a baby forms, the complex science behind it, and even the fact that healthcare professionals sometimes reach their limits—all testify to the existence of a divine Creator.

Do you think altruism is a weakness?

Not at all! I see altruism as a strength because it takes courage to put others before yourself, especially in a world that often values self-interest. True altruism requires strength—emotionally, mentally, and sometimes even physically. Some may confuse kindness with weakness, but in reality, being altruistic while maintaining boundaries is a powerful trait.

What would your question be for the next person?

What helped you realize your purpose in life, and what advice would you give to someone still searching?

This blog and project is a journey into the heart of my family’s stories, an exploration of our lives and connections. I hope it will inspire others to better know their own families, ask questions, and rediscover their loved ones.

For those who, for any reason, struggle to connect with their family, I hope you find friends, a community that supports and understands you. After all, as someone known for their legendary wisdom once said: "It is not good for man to be alone" (Genesis 2:18). The solitude mentioned here is not limited to the purely romantic. Even Jesus Christ did not conduct His ministry in solo. He had many disciples, and among them, a close circle of twelve companions.

Speaking of relationship with God, you may have doubts or questions about it. I, too, sometimes have them. Fortunately, the Bible contains this precious promise: "Call to Me, and I will answer you; I will tell you great and hidden things that you do not know" (Jeremiah 33:3).

May you find in Him a guide, a refuge, and answers.

N’ijwi ryuzuye urukundo,

Irakoze